Rachael Utumapu has spent decades working in a male-dominated world, and that is why she is the perfect person to relate to men during one of the most challenging times of their life.
Rachael was not only the first female career firefighter in New Plymouth, she was also helped formulate the first men’s classes for cancer charity Look Good Feel Better and regularly hosts their online men’s and expert Q&A sessions.
“Everyone who attends a session has sat at the doctor’s and heard them say ‘You have cancer’. I just want to ensure that there’s a positive aspect to what they’re going through. I want them to get to know me and feel the love and care that I have for them. The only thing I can’t do is put my hand on their shoulder and say ‘You’re okay’,” she says.
“It’s really connecting with them and creating the safe space. I can tell when they’re enjoying it or feeling hesitant or they want to speak. Even though it is online, it’s still very personal. Over time you can see their arms uncross, they lean in, they start to talk and share their situation.”
An experienced hairdresser, Rachael has spent nearly 15 years working with Look Good Feel Better, initially running skincare and make-up classes in the New Plymouth region.
“My first touch point was an auntie that had been going through cancer treatment and she went to a Look Good Feel Better session and told me about it. And she said how much she loved it. That got me curious,” the mother of two says.
Rachael’s dedication to cancer patients saw her awarded a Queen’s Service Medal in 2021, so it is no surprise she says it has become “such a huge part of my life, it’s part of my identity”.
She is grateful that her husband David is incredibly supportive of her work with the charity.
“He can see how much it means to me to be able to help others.”
She is still works for Fire & Emergency NZ but no longer drives the trucks on emergency callouts. Now operational standards manager, she oversees advisors across the country. Having spent decades in a male-dominated industry, she finds it easy to relate to men who log on to Look Good Feel Better.
“We talk about how vital communication and sharing is, showing that vulnerability and how important it is to get support and ensure the people close around you know what their role is. People can’t help if they can’t really see what’s underneath the surface.
“Some people find it a real struggle not being able to work or do the things that they used to do and sometimes that emotional mental side of it is as hard as the physical side. There is a feeling of ‘I can’t be the man that I was before’ – that’s all part of identity and comes with an element of grief. Then there is the weight gain, hair loss, fatigue and looking unwell.”
She cites a regular guest speaker, Rhys Jones, chief executive of Fire and Emergency New Zealand and the former Chief of Defence, who shared his experience of a cancer diagnosis.
“He’s done multiple overseas deployments. He’s had high-powered roles. He thought he had to be that strong person for his family. But his family felt even more vulnerable. They wanted to support him but didn’t know how because of this big tough frontage. He realised he had inadvertently made it hard for them.”
Look Good Feel Better’s free wellbeing programme includes both community and online skincare and make-up classes, and a range of online wellbeing offerings including gentle Pilates, chair yoga, podcasts – and regular men’s Q&As. To register for a session or to make a donation to the charity, go to www.lgfb.co.nz
