Tips to build intimacy and togetherness in your relationship

Intimacy is the key ingredient of a successful romantic relationship. In fact according to a survey by global sexual wellness brand, Lovehoney, 62%* of people state that intimacy and having an emotional connection are the most important aspects when it comes to sex and relationships.

Being intimate can mean very different things to different people, it could be as small as holding hands, and there are many ways to be intimate without having sex. 

Lovehoney is encouraging New Zealanders to get creative and reclaim their lost intimacy by sharing their top tips on how to build togetherness. 


There’s no better way to feel closer to your partner than in a warm, romantic bubble bath. Not only is it a great way to unwind after a stressful day, but it’s also a beautiful way to connect and spend quality time together.

So set the scene with some candles, a bath bomb and some relaxing music to help you zen out, and prepare to feel the love. 

Crack out the massage oils

Despite what you may think, massages don’t always have to lead to sex.

Physical contact with the sole purpose of making your lover feel good is a sure fire way to build intimacy. If you really want to impress, take it up a notch with a sensual massage candle or even some Hot Massage Rocks. Not only does it create a romantic ambiance, but you can use the melted candle as a massage oil to nourish your partners skin and ignite their senses. 

Read to one another

We promise that reading is sexy. There’s something incredibly intimate and romantic about switching off from technology and reading with your partner.

Perhaps it’s down to the old school nature of the act, which feels very innocent yet romantically charged, or maybe it feels vulnerable and therefore incredibly private. Either way, cuddling up together and sharing your favourite book with your favourite person is a super special way to bond. 

Monkey business

As our closest living relatives, Chimpanzee build close social bonds through various forms of grooming. And no, we’re not suggesting you eat bugs found from your partner’s hair, but rather spend some time grooming each other to build intimacy. Simple acts such as brushing, braiding or washing each other’s hair is a beautiful way to feel close to one another. 

Not only do we have loads of nerve-endings on our head and neck, but gentle acts such as hair brushing may be linked to fond memories of being cared for as a child, making us feel safe and loved. Isn’t that wonderful!

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