We all have moments when we react in ways that surprise us — snapping, shutting down, or spiralling into over-analysis. But what if these “hot moments” weren’t flaws, but unresolved memories surfacing through the body? Trauma informed hypnotherapist Justine Lette from Hypnosis New Zealand explains how the emerging science of memory reconsolidation offers a powerful and gentle path to emotional reset
Who Are You in Your Hot Moments? We all have them.
Moments when we act out of character.
When something flips inside us and we say things we don’t mean, feel things that don’t make sense, or behave in ways that catch us off guard.
You might find yourself suddenly insecure in a space where you’re usually confident. Or lashing out at someone you love, only to feel guilt or confusion later. These are what I call hot moments — and while they might feel unpredictable, there’s real science behind what’s happening in the body and brain.
Even better, there’s a way to change the pattern — not just manage it, but shift it from the inside out. It’s called memory reconsolidation, and it offers a path back to calm, connection, and choice.
Explicit vs Implicit Memory: How Your Past Still Speaks
To understand hot moments, we need to understand memory.
Our brains store two main types:
Explicit memories are conscious. They carry images, stories, and thoughts. For example, smelling a particular flower might bring back a vivid memory of your grandmother’s garden. You know where it came from and how it shaped you.
Implicit memories, on the other hand, live deeper. These are body-held memories — responses created in times of overwhelm, often in early childhood or even in the womb. They don’t show up as thoughts or pictures, but as sensations: a tight chest, a wave of anxiety, a lump in the throat.
In moments of stress, implicit memories can fire without us realising. And when they do, we often act from the emotional age we were when the memory first formed — which is why a grown adult might suddenly feel like a frightened child.
Each time these memories are triggered and left unprocessed, the brain gathers more data and strengthens the response. A facial expression, a tone of voice, even a colour in the room — all of it can get folded into that memory and make it more sensitive next time.
The Old Belief: Learn to Cope
Until 2001, science believed these trauma-based responses were hardwired. The best we could do was manage them — through avoidance, self-soothing, or therapy. While those tools have value, they rarely resolve the trigger itself.
Then something changed.
The New Science: Memory Reconsolidation
In 2001, researchers discovered that implicit memories aren’t fixed after all. Once a memory is activated, there’s a short window — sometimes just minutes — when it becomes flexible. If we introduce new information during that window, especially something that signals safety, the brain can update the memory and store it differently.
This process is called memory reconsolidation, and it’s one of the most promising developments in trauma-informed work today.
So What Tells the Brain It’s Safe?
One powerful answer: oxytocin — the body’s natural safety chemical.
How to Reset Your Nervous System (Naturally)
You don’t need expensive tools or long meditations to shift your state. Your body already knows what to do.
Think of what kids do after running around wildly. They lean forward, hands on knees, breathe, and look up. Or what someone does after an intense conversation: hand on heart, sighing, gazing at the sky. These aren’t just habits — they’re biological resets.
When we move this way, the body releases oxytocin and tells the brain: The danger has passed.
Here’s how you can activate that same reset:
- Place a hand on your heart
- Lift your chin and look up
- Blink a few times and take a deep breath
- Say quietly to yourself: “I’m safe now”
- Gently stretch your neck or shoulders as you return to the room
- Look around for where light enters the room
This creates a mismatch experience — your body is sending safety signals in a moment your brain expects danger. That contradiction is exactly what opens the door for healing. And with repetition, these signals can help rewire emotional responses themselves.
Why Digging Into the Past Isn’t Always Helpful
A common response to feeling triggered is to overanalyse it. We want to know why we feel this way, what memory it comes from, what story it’s trying to tell.
But the truth is — your body doesn’t always need a story.
In fact, chasing the narrative can sometimes reinforce the fear response and activate the nervous system even more.
Instead, try staying with sensation. Stay with the now. Let your body guide you.
Often, your nervous system needs presence more than it needs explanation.
You Are Not Your Triggers
Your hot moments aren’t character flaws. They’re not proof that something’s wrong with you. They’re messages from a nervous system that learned, long ago, how to keep you safe.
But those old messages don’t have to run the show anymore.
Through awareness, gentle practice, and the power of memory reconsolidation, you can return to yourself — calm, connected, and clear.
Not by erasing the past. But by updating the story your body tells about it.
Author Bio
Justine Lette is a clinical hypnotherapist, international speaker, and the head of Hypnosis New Zealand — NZ Professional Body. With a special focus on trauma-informed care and memory reconsolidation, Justine empowers both clients and therapists to heal deeply and sustainably. Her work blends science, compassion, and mind-body approaches to create lasting change.
