Show Mum you love her this Mother’s Day with a thoughtful gift that will truly hit the mark! Try theming your gift around your mum’s love language instead of offering the usual slippers and books.
What is a love language?
It’s a category that shows how people give and receive affection. You can have more than one love language, but there will be one that’s more dominant than others.
When Gary Chapman created the five love languages in 1992, he had no way of knowing what a phenomenon it would become. As a couples counsellor, he observed that partners often misunderstood each other’s needs, not because they weren’t trying to be affectionate or show they care, but because they had different ways of receiving and giving love.
He summarised the ways humans receive and give love into five descriptions and explained that understanding these differences can be the key to success in relationships. You might make your partner a daily coffee as an ‘act of service’ but if they’d rather have a hug for ‘physical touch’ then they’re not going to be as appreciative of this gesture as you would hope.
Love languages can be applied to everyone you have relationships with. So how do you tell which love language your Mum has?
Observe what she does for you and others and note when she is happiest. Or you could send her the link to this fun online quiz here.
Words of Affirmation
People with words of affirmation as a love language value verbal acknowledgments of affection, including frequent I love you’s, compliments, words of appreciation, and verbal encouragement, said in person or through digital communication like texting and social media.
Ways to gift it for Mother’s Day:
Set a reminder in your phone to text your Mum you love her.
Write a letter, poem or story about Mum and why you love her.
Make her a really special Mother’s Day card to cherish and keep.
Tell the world how much you love her with a thoughtful social media post (and make sure you tag her).
Quality Time
People with the love language of quality time feel the most adored when people actively want to spend time with them with no distractions. For it to be quality time though, they want full presence with eye contact, phones put away and a genuine interest in what they say.
Ways to gift it for Mother’s Day:
Book tickets to an experience that you can share (that you know she’ll love) like the theatre, art gallery opening, cooking demonstration or class talk of some sort.
Make them feel number one, and put away the phone and any other distractions.
Take Mum for a picnic, walk along the beach or in the bush and talk.
Does she play a game like Mahjong or bridge? Book in a game with her.
Sit with her and just talk – no phones or TV, just you and her with a cuppa.
Physical Touch
These types feel loved when they receive physical signs of affection, including kissing, holding hands, and cuddling on the couch. Physical intimacy and touch can be incredibly affirming and serve as a powerful emotional connector.
Ways to gift it for Mother’s Day:
Greet her with a big hug.
Put your arm around her or hold her hand.
If you can’t be physically near her and speak over the phone, tell her how much you loved her hugs when you were growing up or the last time you saw her.
Send her a cuddly teddy bear.
Acts of Service
It’s the actions that count – making you a morning coffee, helping out with things around the house, doing something for you when you need it. You value when people go out of their way to make your life easier.
Ways to gift it for Mother’s Day:
Make her breakfast in bed.
Make her a coffee or cup of tea.
Do anything and everything that she needs to be done on that day. Maybe her car has needed a WOF for a while? Or something needs fixing.
Book her in for a manicure, pedicure or massage.
Receiving Gifts
Pretty straightforward, this is when people feel loved when given gifts. It’s not always about the monetary value but the symbolic thought behind the item. Those with style will recognise the value of the gift-giving process: careful reflection, deliberate choosing of the object to represent the relationship and the emotional benefits from receiving.
Ways to gift it for Mother’s Day:
Try to find out something that she needs or likes before Mother’s Day so that you can buy that for her (within budget).
Make her a photo album of good times shared.
Put a favourite family photo in a frame for her to hang on her wall or put on her shelves.
If you can, make her painting or sculpture.
