Good’s wellness columnist provides some advice for falling up, not down, during life’s harder times
Words Rachel Grunwell. Illustration Janelle Barone of Makers MGMT
Life can be tough sometimes – for everyone. It is not always full of beautiful sunrises or perfect yoga poses. Not everything goes according to plan. Nor does every big idea we have result in a thunderous applause or success.
Everyday life is raw and real and isn’t always easy, or perfect, all the time for everyone. Only dogs appear happy most of the time.
Tough times can occur in all kinds of areas: career, health, personal relationships to financial issues.
In a crisis, you can fall down – freeze in fear, feel sorry for yourself, embrace “woe-is-me” and feel defeated. Or you can “fall up”. The latter, is when you look at opportunities instead of what you lost and work at moving positively forwards to thrive.
By the way, I may be a wellness writer, but I too have “wobbles” in life – often. I’m human. Juggling work, a family and everyone’s needs is always a balancing act. But after a period of being low, I’ll pick myself up and adjust my mindset to forge ahead.
As a yoga teacher, I often talk with students about mindset and this idea of “falling up”. How you view the world can affect how you think, feel and perform at work and how you cope in relationships. It’s all interlinked.
Here are some of my tips to consider if you need help to fall “up”. I hope one of the points resonates and helps you through a tough time.
- Try to look at your situation objectively and with a clear head (ie give time for your raw emotion to calm down). Often things are not as bad as you first believe. Try to look at the bigger picture.
- Follow your heart and authentically live your life to be the best version of “you”. Use this to guide you.
- Know what you truly care about so you can focus on that – and not all the surrounding “noise”. Don’t waste time on the small stuff that doesn’t matter.
- Try to look at things from the other person’s view if you are dealing with someone you think is unreasonable. Have empathy. It helps to try and get where others are at so you can relate to them.
- However, always be unapologetically “you” when you need to be. Living life to constantly “people please” can be bad for your health. It’s exhausting. There’s real stress too in “holding stuff in”. So, know your own mind and don’t be afraid to say what you believe in and stand up for what’s important. No one likes someone who is chameleon-like (someone who will change to fit in). I personally respect people who know who they are and have real views.
- Be okay about not always following the crowd with your thinking. That is how some original thoughts, designs and breakthroughs can be made.
- Read lots, experience lots, and have a world view, rather than a narrow outlook.
- Surround yourself with kind and wise friends – they help to shape you.
- Remember you deserve to be happy. Self-love and self-belief can help to propel you forwards.
- Have a long-game plan and remember to enjoy the journey and not just the end result. That’s such a big secret to being happy – enjoying the “now”.
- Lastly, don’t be a dreamer, be a “doer”. Know your dreams and work on them passionately.
Rachel is a mum, marathoner, writer and yoga teacher. For more, visit inspiredhealth.co.nz